Re-evaluation

We had our re-eval yesterday and we are not quite ready to graduate. I was prepared for this news, so it's all okay. S got her two least favorite exercises back, but she knows it' s not forever and they are nothing new. So it looks like April may be when we finish. My goal was to be finished with everything by the end of the school year. I had to think long and hard to come up with anything we need to work on. It wasn't long ago that I needed to prioritize what was the most pressing issue. Now that we are near the end, I'm thinking of making the blog public. Now that is has ended up to be so long, I wonder if anyone will actually read it. I am so glad that I kept this journal, it will always remind me of where we started and how far we've come. By writing things down, it has allowed me to contemplate and figure things out that I may have otherwise overlooked. A couple of people have said that they wished I would write a book of our story. I wish I could accomplish that, but I didn't write enough details down. I have left out my daughter's personal memories to keep it private. If I weren't so involved in my kids lives, I would have time to write more. But when you have one child who takes up every waking moment and the you have to fit in time for your other kids and pets and household, there is definitely no time to write. I got an iPad for Christmas, so maybe that will give me more opportunity to write things down. I have also kept this rather clinical in nature because I thought about my daughter reading it one day. I wanted it to be something she could read and feel great about. Many bloggers get very personal and I would imagine that their kids would feel bad after reading about their trials. I understand that some kids with RAD are very difficult to live with and I'm not criticizing what they write about their families. It' s just not what I wanted to do. This started out very concise, just the facts but evolved into a little more. I guess it's because things changed for us along the way. Looking back, my poor little girl was keeping herself from feeling anything at all. She was just happy all the time. I think she is happy by nature, but it's just not normal to be happy all the time. She still hides sadness. We have a 15 year old dog who has possibly days left to live. We have been talking about death for several months now in anticipation of his inevitable death. I knew she needed to be introduced to it, as hard as it was to have to tell her. Something tells me she has been around death before she entered our family. It will be interesting to see how she reacts to this death. I know I will not be able to keep my tears inside. She gets very upset when anyone cries. I'm sure it will be worse for her to see me crying. I hope I will remember to post about it when the time comes. Life has been so busy lately, and I haven't had time to do much of anything.