Endings

These last few weeks have been terribly busy. We have been slackers with NR. Our routine has been so disrupted, it has been impossible to be consistent. Some days have me wanting to be totally uninvolved in anything outside the confines of my house. I realize that is quite impossible, because the reason we do all that we do is because of the kids and on their behalf. Today is the last day of school for S, she seems to be doing okay. I worry about the last hour or so, when they say goodbyes and she realizes that this is an ending. She has such anxiety over endings, to her they signify a loss. No one can quite understand how she feels. That's okay, I just wish they would try. I wish they could see that she is trying her hardest to not let her feelings show. That showing any outward sign makes her vulnerable beyond what she can handle. When I attempt to explain it, I get sympathy, for her and for me. We don't need that, we need someone to listen AND understand. Right now, we are coping and it is working out just fine. I hope her healing can advance over the summer to give her the skills, trust and confidence to make it through whatever next school year brings. I plan to do the full Ils program over the summer. We also have an appointment with a new vision therapist in another state. I have spoken with him personally, and it seems that he offers a different approach. It will be hugely expensive, but we have to do it. We will also incorporate our NR into our routine. Our new patterns involve using the eyes, and it's very difficult for her. Maybe after we see the vision therapist, he can offer some advice.